Silent Love
by NewlyWrittenBeginnings
Summary: A short little argument with Asuka causes Shinji to spill everything. AxS Oneshot


Silent Love

Disclaimer: Don't own NGE or anything.

Shinji ran as fast as he could away from the apartment. He couldn't believe that he had just done that. He could not believe he had just done that. He had just stood up to the Great Asuka Langley Sohryu, but in doing so he had just made one of the biggest mistakes he had ever made in his entire life, and it wasn't what you'd expect. He would've rather had the most angry, furious Asuka than do what he had just done. He had confessed his feelings for her, or rather screamed them out. He was sure the entire complex had heard him.

Flashback

The peaceful silence that Shinji had been enjoying while he sat on the couch was cut to an abrupt halt when he heard Asuka slam her door so hard that it shook the apartment. Right then he had a feeling that the day was not going to be a very good one. He quietly pulled out his SDAT and closed his eyes, hoping that if he didn't make any noise or do anything that would bring attention to himself that she would leave him alone.

He sat quietly for a few seconds, listening through the low volume of his SDAT trying to hear whether she was trying to sneak up on him or something. He heard her enter the kitchen. The clatter of plates and the sound of scraping told him that she was eating what was by now at ten o'clock in the morning a cold breakfast. He listened for a few seconds longer and nearly jumped when he suddenly heard her voice come out in a yell.

"Shinji these eggs are over cooked! Can't you do anything right?" She yelled. She waited for him to make some sort of reply, but when she got none she got a little irradiated "Third Child listen to me when I talk to you! She screamed. When she didn't get a response she stood up and walked over to him.

Shinji could hear her footsteps across the carpeted floor. Quickly he blasted the music in an attempt to make it look like he had been playing the music to loud for him to hear her.

He could feel her presence hovering over him and he had to fight the urge to open his eyes and look up at her. For several seconds he could feel her standing over him. He almost thought that she was going to leave except when she screamed at the top of her lungs.

"Third Child I said listen to me when I talk to you!" Shinji nearly winced. Her scream had nearly deafened him and the blaring music wasn't helping.

When she still didn't get a response Asuka's anger quickly rose from irritation to full bloomed rage. Quickly her hands reached for the SDAT and before Shinji could react had pulled it from his hands.

Shinji opened his eyes to see Asuka throw it down against the floor and kicked it across the room. He watched it as it impacted the wall, shattering into little pieces. He looked over at Asuka who was now wiping her hands off as if she did some hard feat.

"Well maybe now you'll listen to me." She looked over at Shinji with a smirk on her face.

"Asuka what the heck did you do that for!" He screamed at her as he stood up from the couch. Asuka nearly took a step back. She hadn't expected that. She expected him to start crying or something. Not get up and yell at her.

She shook herself out of her shock. "Well I wouldn't have had to do that if you had just responded when I was trying to talk to you." She said crossing her arms.

"Yeah well that didn't mean you had to go and do that!" He could feel his anger start to rise.

Asuka was surprised to say the least. He was actually starting to argue with her. She never thought that he would ever have the spine to argue with anyone let alone her. "So the coward can grow a spine when he has to." She thought.

"What'd you expect me to do? Just let you sit there and ignore me?" She replied. "If he wants an argument than fine I'll give him one." She thought, feeling her anger rise as well.

Shinji stared at her. "Are you so selfish and egotistical that you think we have to always listen to you even if we can't hear you!"

"What! I am not selfish and egotistical!" She yelled back at him. It seemed that he had struck a cord with her. "If anyone is selfish and egotistical it's you!"

He looked at her in disbelief. "How can you call me selfish and egotistical when you're the one that is constantly putting people down and thinking you're better than everyone? You expect everyone to just do what you want. And you expect them to do it perfectly." Shinji could start to feel all the feelings he had felt when he got insulted and hit begin to rise and further strengthen his frustration and anger. "Not only that but the only time you show respect for anyone it's when they stand up for themselves and don't act like cowards!"

"Yeah so? That's because their willing to fight for what they believe in and not let anyone trample their beliefs without a fight!" she yelled at him with such an intense feeling in her voice that it caused Shinji to falter, but he quickly recovered.

"Why don't you ever just respect someone for who and what they are? Not everyone is so perfect as Kaji!" he could feel the jealously that he had whenever Asuka had flirted with Kaji beginning to surface. He liked Kaji but whenever he saw Asuka around him he often felt the pang of hurt that told him she only like Kaji and not him.

Asuka was about to scream something at him, but she had to pause for a second not really knowing how to answer. "You're right, Kaji is the perfect guy. He's not weak and cowardly like you!"

Shinji could feel the pang of hurt ring through his heart at those words. "Asuka, Kaji is twice your age! Do you really think that he would want to go out with you especially since he's already in love with Misato?"

Asuka felt his words pierce her. She knew he was right about that. He was in love with Misato, but that doesn't mean she would give up know matter how futile it was. "Then tell me Shinji who should I like? Someone as weak and spineless as you?" She screamed at him at the top of her lungs.

"Yes!" He screamed back, far louder than she had. He froze at the sudden realization of what he had just said. He watched Asuka's eyes widen. He could see that the anger in her eyes were beginning to seep away and in it's place the look of shock, confusion, and something he couldn't register.

Not wanting to give her a chance to react he did the one thing that he could think of. He ran. And he ran hard and fast.

End flashback

He couldn't believe that he didn't realize what he was doing when he got on the subject of Kaji. He should've known that he was going to confess the way he felt for her. He was such an idiot! Now he had just given her every reason for her to hate him. As well as every reason to kill him. Unless by some miracle she had mutual feelings, which he highly doubted.

He still didn't believe how stupid he was! And why was it that the one time that he had decided to stand up for himself that he told her how he felt. He mentally smacked himself. "Because it was the one time you were brave enough to say it and not worry about the consequences."

He stopped running and when he caught his breath started laughing. "Guess there wouldn't of been a better time to say it." He continued to laugh for several seconds earning himself strange looks from by passers.

When he stopped laughing he looked around and found that he had ran straight into a park, which was almost a mile away. He looked around and found a nearby bench and decided to take a rest and also give Asuka time to cool down if she was angry. And perhaps use the time to think of what to do if Asuka went hunting for him.

Misato gave the door a hard shove as she walked inside with her hands full with some groceries. "Shinji, Asuka I'm home!" She called as she set the bags down on the counter.

Walking into the living room she found a dumbfounded Asuka sitting on the couch. "Hey Asuka what's wrong?" She asked as she walked over to her. "Asuka?"

Quietly, very quietly Asuka said, "Shinji l-loves me."

"What?" Misato asked not hearing what she had said.

Asuka turned to face her. "I said Shinji loves me."

Misato's eyes widened. "What?" she said almost not believing what Asuka said. "How do you know?" Misato had a tinge of excitement in her voice. She had suspected that for a short while Shinji had feelings for the red head, but wasn't entirely sure.

"He told me during our argument." She said the shock of Shinji's confession beginning to wear off.

"Shinji argued with you?" She watched Asuka nod. Misato was surprised. She never expected Shinji to argue with Asuka. It was kind of surprising and maybe a little satisfying. She wondered when he was going to start sticking up for himself. "Why were you two arguing?" She watched Asuka point to the broken pieces of the SDAT. "What happened to Shinji's SDAT?"

"I uh kicked it across the room because he wasn't listening to me." She said as some guilt was beginning to settle in her chest about breaking the SDAT. She shouldn't of done it since he probably couldn't even hear her over the music.

A look of disappointment crossed Misato's face. "Asuka." She slightly scolded. "What made him tell you?" Misato asked. She really wanted to know what had caused Shinji to express the way he felt about her.

Asuka shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. To be honest with you I don't think he actually meant to. We were on the subject of me liking Kaji and he told me that he could never like me and I should like someone else. So when I asked him who I like I didn't expect him to say himself."

Misato didn't say anything for a few seconds before she asked. "So do you feel the same way?"

Asuka shook her head. "I don't know."

The two sat in silence. Misato had to find a way to convince Asuka that she like Shinji. Although Asuka didn't know it Misato knew that she shared the same feelings. Otherwise she would be a raving lunatic and would be trying to crush him with her Eva. She just wasn't sure how to show her.

"Hey Asuka where is Shinji anyway." Misato asked.

"He ran shortly after telling me. Spineless coward." She muttered.

Misato smiled a little from her statement. "You know that you should probably go looking for him." Asuka was about to say something but Misato cut her off. "It took quite a bit of courage for Shinji to go out and admit his personal feelings, especially if they were about you."

"But it was in the middle of a heated argument." She replied. "You and I both know that under other circumstances that he never would've done that."

"Maybe, but the fact that he switched to a subject concerning who you liked showed that he was planning on telling you whether he himself realized what he was doing." Asuka didn't say anything for several moments and Misato hoped that maybe she was getting somewhere.

"But he ran away." Asuka said exasperated. "You're not supposed to run away when you admit your love for a person! You're supposed to stay and wait so the person can say how they feel!" Asuka groaned as she put her face into her hands.

Misato's smile grew. She was getting closer. She could feel it. "It sounds like you were ready to admit the way you felt as well."

Asuka looked up at her. "Maybe."

"I thought you said that you didn't like him." Misato said a little bit of excitement building in her voice.

"I never said I didn't like him I said I don't know." Asuka replied resting her head on her hands, feeling a little exhaustion settling in. Two arguments in one day plus a raging battle in her head was beginning to wear her out.

Misato sighed. How long did it take for you to decide whether you liked a person or not? She decided that some action needed to be taken. Grabbing her arm Misato pulled Asuka to her feet. "Asuka, go find Shinji right now!"

Asuka looked at her with confusion. "What? Why?"

"Because you two need to talk and get your feelings in sync. Now go look for him!" She started pushing Asuka toward the door, but it seemed she wasn't going without a fight. "Asuka don't fight me one this! You know I can make this an order!" All resistance that Asuka had been giving her died away.

Asuka turned on her heel and faced her. "But I don't even know where to look!"

"Well that's what searching is for." She watched Asuka's jaw drop.

"He could be on the other side of town by now!" She saw Misato shake her head.

"No I don't think so Asuka. I don't think that Shinji would want to be that far away from you. Even if you were out to kill him." Asuka sighed and folded her arms.

"Fine, I'll go looking for him." she said opening the door. "But if I have to go on the other side of town to find him I'm gonna be furious, so you'd had better be prepared." She said walking outside. "Now lets just hope that I can find him." she thought deciding which way to go.

As she looked down both ways of the sidewalk a small glare caught her eye. She walked over to it and found that it was Shinji's Nerv ID badge. She picked it up and smiled. "Be ready Shinji I'm coming for you." She said to herself.

Shinji sighed as he looked up at the sky. The sun was beginning to set. He hadn't realized how long he had been out. He debated on whether he should go back to the apartment but what if Asuka was angry at him? She would either kill him or make sure he could never walk again.

"Well I wouldn't have to worry about piloting Eva anymore." He laughed somewhat.

He looked down at the ground. What was he going to do? He couldn't avoid her forever, and even if he somehow could he knew his feelings would push him back towards her. He was a little disappointed with himself for running away. Now Asuka was going to think of him as an even bigger coward. He shouldn't have run away. He had been running his entire life and you'd think that for once he could just stand up and take whatever he was going to get and not be considered a coward.

"And that's why Asuka will never like me." He said quietly to himself. "I don't get why I even like her. It's not like she'll give me any kind of chance." His head dropped. "What I also don't get is why she the only thing she cares about is backbone. Just because some people aren't that brave or strong doesn't mean that they can't be." He could fell the tears begin to sting his eyes. "Why is that the only thing that you care about Asuka?" he shut his eyes and could feel the tears begin to fall down his face.

He suddenly felt a soft, gentle touch begin to caress his cheek. He opened his eyes to find Asuka kneeling in front of him, her hand against his cheek wiping the tears that were streaming down his face. The two stared at each other for a few seconds before Asuka stood up and sat next to him.

A silence past between them. Neither of them really knew what to do or say. Both of their minds were racing. They each had several questions, but didn't know how to ask them.

Shinji could feel his heart racing. He was surprised that she wasn't killing him, so that gave him a small hope that she might feel the same way or she was thinking of something else that she could do to him. He swallowed hard. He knew he should say something, but what? Should he apologize or explain why he had just gushed out about how he felt. What should he do?

He suddenly felt a light weight placed on his shoulder. He looked over to find Asuka resting her head on it. He could feel his heart beat even faster.

The silence began to drag on even longer and Shinji was growing a little uncomfortable. She hadn't said anything and it was kind of scaring him. He decided that he should break it. "Um Asuka, I" She cut him off.

"Shhh." Was all she said.

He was getting more and more uncomfortable as time passed. His muscles were beginning to stiffen and he was getting nervous. What the heck was she doing?

"Shinji relax." She said quietly. "I'm not going to do anything to you. Just relax." She slowly felt his muscles begin to relax and she smiled.

He wasn't sure why he believed her but he did. He had to wonder though what exactly she was doing. "Asuka." He started quietly. "What are you doing?"

When she didn't respond Shinji had thought she hadn't heard him or had fallen asleep and was about to ask again but she softly said, "I'm enjoying the peaceful silence now be quiet baka." He quickly obliged.

The two sat there for several minutes, watching the sun slowly set. The colors of the sky seemed to shine over their faces. Neither of them moved as the sun disappeared over the horizon. Even when darkness began to fall and the lights of the park began to light up.

Shinji looked down at Asuka and wondered if she fell asleep, but the fast and uneven rise and fall of her chest showed that she wasn't. He was starting to wonder if this was the same loud, obnoxious Asuka that he had been living with. She seemed so different. Did telling her how he felt have this much effect on her, but that wouldn't explain why she wasn't talking to him and using his shoulder as a pillow.

"Shinji." Her voice pulled him from his thoughts.

"Yes." He replied.

"Why did you run away after you told me how you felt." She asked softly.

He stiffened a little. He wasn't quite sure how to answer. He really didn't know why he had ran either. "Because I guess that I was afraid that you would say you didn't feel the same way."

"You mean you weren't afraid that I would kill you or something." She saw him shake his head. "You know that you shouldn't have run." She lifted her head off his shoulder.

"I know but I guess I let my fear get the better of me." He looked over at her.

A small smile crossed her face. "That happens to you a lot. You should learn how to overcome your fear."

"I know." He looked away from her. He wanted to ask her if she felt the same way but was still afraid that he would be rejected. He mentally smacked himself. He had to suck it up. He had to just grit his teeth and ask her. Otherwise if by some miracle she did like him then he would never find out because she would wait for him to make the first move.

Or she would scream that she liked him weeks later, but he really didn't fell like waiting.

He took a deep breath and readied himself for either answer, and promised himself that if she rejected him he wouldn't cry. "A-Asuka, I wanted to know if you happen to feel the same way."

His heart started to beat faster and faster with each passing moment. What was she going to say? Yes? No? His mind raced, and he was sure that he was going to have a heart attack if she didn't answer soon.

He then felt her hands grasp the sides of his face and before he could react he found her lips pressed against his. His eyes widened and he was sure his heart flat lined for a second. He sat there shocked for a little while, but very slowly he reacted. He pressed his lips hard against hers and as he did every emotion, feeling, thought was thrown into it, making her feel how much he cared for her.

He wasn't exactly sure how long they had kissed, but it didn't matter. All he knew was that it was the best thing he had ever felt. And by the way she reacted he was pretty sure that she would agree with him.

As the two broke apart Asuka smiled at him. "Does that answer your question?" The two stared at each other for a few seconds before she spoke again. "We should probably get back to Misato before she begins to worry." Shinji nodded.

"You didn't tell Misato about our argument did you?" Shinji asked a few moments after they started walking back. He was a little concerned on how their guardian would react if she found out what happened.

"Yeah I did." She saw Shinji blush.

"I was hoping that no one would find out that I confessed." He said. "We probably shouldn't tell her what happened between us." Asuka nodded.

"I agree. She'd never let us hear the end of it."

Misato watched the two walk into the apartment over a can of beer. "So I see that since Shinji's still in one piece and you both look happy that you both made out." Her statement caused the two to start blushing. She started at them for a few seconds, wondering why they both were so red. Then it hit her. "Wait, you didn't. Did you?"

"Night!" The two said in unison, quickly running into their bedrooms.

Misato started laughing. "Well I guess they really did make out."


End file.
